Summer Shows Part I

30 May

I love TV. I love  it like it’s my job. People who claim they don’t own TVs and try and act all high and mighty because they don’t indulge in reality programming can suck it because TV is great, entertaining and often times extremely educational. Take for instance my new favorite show Parking Wars (on A&E Tuesdays at 10). This little slice of heaven is a reality show that follows the workers of the Philadelphia Parking Authority and Detroit’s Municipal Parking Department and simply this show is hilarious (and educational for the drivers of America.) You would not believe how people react to getting tickets, getting their cars towed or, worst of all, getting the boot. What is most hilarious about this show is how people try and argue their way out of the tickets every single time (I’m sure you’ve all done this once or twice) and every single time they are told they have to call a hotline on which the workers themselves cannot get a representative. People yell, scream, cry and abuse these workers for tickets that a) are deserved and b) cost little more than a haircut at supercuts.

What really sold me on the show was the first encounter I ever witnessed. A woman and her friend both parked in a “no standing anytime” zone claimed that their tickets were unwarranted because not only did one of them work for the wholesome company Mary Kay which clearly means she should be exempt from abiding traffic laws,  but nowhere in the area did it say “no parking.” While they were indeed correct about the signage they were both clearly morons.  What made this encounter even more enthralling was the conviction with which they argued. With such passion and fury they proceeded to explain that a sign which says “no standing” is clearly meant to be interpreted as a rule for pedestrians and not for cars – no standing allowed on a public sidewalk but parking is A-OK. Of course they were then schooled by the parking authority on rules, vocabulary and subsequently embarrassed on national television for being complete idiots.

What makes the show even better is when people try to argue the boot off of their car. Now I don’t actually know how to drive, and naturally I’ve never gotten a ticket, but I’m pretty sure that if the Parking Authority is forced to put a medieval torture device on the wheel to prevent you from driving, you’ve done something wrong. When words fail, these ticket-dodging crazies are forced to act. If I’ve learned anything from watching Parking Wars it’s that when you can’t convince Garfield to take the boot off of your car the only logical thing to do (aside from actually paying your fines) is to just hop on in and drive away with the boot on. Makes perfect sense. Check out the dude featured at 2:31. This guy is a real gem. Rather than surrendering to the Parking Authority he instead decides to damage 2 car bumpers, scratch the booting van and fuck up his own car beyond recognition all before running a red light. That is a true champ!

Now tell me that didn’t just put you in a great mood! And for all you intelligencia out there, books will be obsolete in 10 years (thanks, Kindle!) so you might as well pony up, dumb down and watch some Parking Wars – it’s the series of the Summer!

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2 Responses to “Summer Shows Part I”

  1. Valeria May 30, 2011 at 3:33 pm #

    I felt so bad for that unemployed vet! That was probably the only part of the video that did not humor me.

    • killacan May 30, 2011 at 3:35 pm #

      Agreed. Not always a happy ending!

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